


Damn Ninja Turtle

by mckvch (RaiseYourVoice)



Series: Saphael Winter Tales [9]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Attempt at Humor, Baking, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Idiots in Love, Kissing, Living Together, M/M, Pet Names, Teasing, Winter, simon is a dork
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-09
Updated: 2016-12-09
Packaged: 2018-09-02 22:09:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,182
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8685235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RaiseYourVoice/pseuds/mckvch
Summary: "I don't get annoyed about it," Raphael complained while thrusting the bowl with the dry ingredients into his boyfriend's hands in a silent prompt do take care of this."You don't? Why do you have that look on your face, then?""That look? What does that even mean?""The frowny-face," Simon pointed out and placed the bowl on the counter before reaching out to Raphael, pressing the pad of his index finger gently against the other's forehead to smooth out his lover's still lingering frown."You will have a wrinkly forehead when you're 30 if you don't get rid of this habit," he added with a smirk and leant in to brush a kiss to the spot that his fingertip had just touched a second ago. Raphael exhaled an annoyed huff but kept himself from frowning again and instead, he pointed at the bowl."Help. Now."





	

"You actually ask me for help? I have to mark this day on my calendar!" Simon grinned triumphantly and Raphael buried his face in his hands with a long-suffering sigh. He had dreaded this outcome but there had been no way around it because he had promised his younger brother to help with the bake sale thing at his middle-school and there was no way to get out of this.

"How about you shut up and help me instead, _idiota_?!" Raphael glared and tried his hardest to seem convincingly annoyed by his lover's antics but that had stopped working about two months after their first meeting. It didn't hurt to still try every once in a while, though.

"If you ask this nicely, _bebé_ , sure," he replied with a shit-eating grin and Raphael couldn't help but groan.

" _Te odio_."

"No, you really don't and I will never fail to mention how ridiculous it is that you always use all kinds of pet names for me but get annoyed when I do the same," Simon pointed out with an eye roll that was more fond than annoyed.

"I don't get annoyed about it," Raphael complained while thrusting the bowl with the dry ingredients into his boyfriend's hands in a silent prompt do take care of this.

"You don't? Why do you have that look on your face, then?"

" _That look_? What does that even mean?"

"The frowny-face," Simon pointed out and placed the bowl on the counter before reaching out to Raphael, pressing the pad of his index finger gently against the other's forehead to smooth out his lover's still lingering frown.

"You will have a wrinkly forehead when you're 30 if you don't get rid of this habit," he added with a smirk and leant in to brush a kiss to the spot that his fingertip had just touched a second ago. Raphael exhaled an annoyed huff but kept himself from frowning _again_ and instead, he pointed at the bowl.

"Help. Now."

"Don't get your panties in a twist and please talk to me in proper sentences, this is ridiculous." Simon grinned at him before tugging the book with the recipe closer to check what else was needed. He opened the fridge and plucked two eggs from the package before he handed the butter to Raphael.

"Measure it and put it in a microwaveable cup because we need to melt it," Simon ordered before getting another bowl for all the wet ingredients and mix them together, adding the melted butter when Raphael handed the small bowl to him, still warm from the microwave.

"When you told me you agreed to help Chio and bring something for the bake sale, I already knew it would end up with me doing the work. It's kind of fascinating, that you're so good at cooking but still unable to bake the simplest things," Simon commented a while later when his boyfriend was slowly pouring the dry ingredients in the bowl for Simon to mix them with a spatula. Raphael huffed softly and Simon could almost feel the other's unimpressed gaze bore into the side of his head.

"What's that supposed to mean? I'm not _incapable_ of baking, I'm simply better at cooking. A lot better, admittedly. But still," Raphael replied in protest and Simon could picture him drawing his eyebrows together without even looking at his boyfriend.

"Remind me again of how this baking incident last year happened? I still remember coming home to the fire brigade and a half burnt down kitchen," Simon shot back and for some reason he thought it was a good idea to point the spatula accusingly at his lover but with his swift movement he managed to splatter some of the cake batter on Raphael's face and his shirt.

" _I'm_ the incapable one? Maybe you should rethink this statement, _dear_." Raphael glared at him and Simon gulped before curling the corners of his mouth into a slightly nervous yet hopefully sweet smile.

"Sorry?" He offered sheepishly and hastily stuck the spatula back into the bowl, into the cake batter. Raphael's frown deepened even more and Simon bit his bottom lip, blinking at his boyfriend with his long lashes in an attempt of making innocent deer-eyes at the other.

" _Lo siento_ ," Simon added and suppressed a grin when Raphael finally reacted by rolling his eyes, unable to keep this reaction in check.

"Saying it in Spanish won't help your stupid ass either," Raphael commented and suddenly grabbed Simon by the front of his shirt, ignoring the other's Yelp of "You love my stupid ass!", and gently pushed him backwards until his back bumped into the wall in between the fridge and the door. Simon felt the light switch pressing into his lower back but he didn't get a chance to mention his discomfort and to suggest a different wall because then Raphael's lips were on his.

Simon didn't expect this to be his 'punishment' for his mishap - not that he ever got any kind of punishment for being stupid other than glared and the silent treatment and even those were mostly to get back at him - and he gasped in surprise. Raphael's tongue immediately took the opportunity to push into his mouth but just when Simon was about to respond to the kiss property, eager to taste more of his lover, Raphael abruptly pulled back again.

Simon was about to protest but was stopped when he notices something sticking to the side of his nose and his chin, realising that by kissing him, Raphael had also shared some of the cake batter from his face with him.

"You are such a child," Simon whined but he was barely able to suppress the laughter bubbling up in his chest at the realisation that Raphael had kissed him to subtly smear cake batter in his face.

"Says the guy wearing sweatpants with The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles all over them?" Raphael shot back with a smirk and Simon pouted at him, wiping the cake batter off his face with the back of his hand.

"Come on, I know you secretly like them."

"When you're not wearing them, sure," Raphael replied dryly and his boyfriend snorted before he actually grabbed the hem of his sweatpants and pushed them down to tug them off his long legs. Draping the item of clothing over the back of one of the chairs, Simon grinned as his incredulous looking boyfriend.

"Better? Can we get back to baking now?"

"You're impossible..." Raphael pinched the back of his nose between his index finger and thumb, trying to wrap his mind around the fact that he lived together with a guy that was mentally at the age of 12 way too many times to count as normal. Almost two years of relationship and sometimes it still baffled him that he had fallen head over heels for a moron who baked a cake in the middle of December in his boxer briefs that...had a damn Ninja Turtle printed on the right butt cheek - it was the one called Raphael, of course.

**Author's Note:**

>  _Te odio_ \- I hate you  
>  _Lo siento_ \- I'm sorry


End file.
